Andrew Dubber

Photo by freshwater2006

Since I started doing my “idea of the day” thing, I’ve had a few compliments here and there – and more noticeably, I’ve had quite a few people say to me that they couldn’t possibly have a good idea every day.

I disagree. I reckon anyone could have good ideas every day. Even me. And it’s not hard. That is to say, it’s only hard if you struggle to have a good idea, rather than just ideas of any kind.

How do you have good ideas? Have lots and lots of bad ones. Fail – and fail often. Simple as that. The trick is just to pick the least terrible one, and then only tell people about that one. I reckon one in ten will be passable. The rest will be rubbish.

To illustrate my point – and at the risk of looking like a complete idiot, here’s a selection of ideas of mine that haven’t made it to be my ‘idea of the day’ blog posts for reasons that will very quickly become obvious to you.

Walk-through dog wash
Like a drive-through car wash, but for dogs. Don’t do that. That would be stupid.

Card-readers for beggars
No spare change? No problem! I take all major debit and credit cards.

Microscope glasses
Yeah. So you could, like, see everything’s molecules as you walk down the street, or something…

Chinese tea ceremony, but for beer
Why shouldn’t we invent a ritual? Surely it’d be an ancient tradition eventually…

Bath thermostat
No more going cold. Stay in the bath forever! With constant temperature maintenance, you can finish War and Peace without ever having to reach for a towel.

First Church of Atheism
Why should you have to be religious to go to church on Sunday? All of the social benefits, and a good sing-song – without all that God nonsense.

A ‘really surprise me’ music recommendation engine
Software that will suggest music to you based on your listening history. But it’ll suggest music that not only have you never heard before – but you were not even aware that such music even existed. Love Kasabian and Lady Gaga? Here’s some Schnittke and Clifton Chenier!

Wing-mirrors for laptops
I know that someone’s already come up with mirrors for computers – but these ones slide out from the side of the laptop lid like a Swiss Army Knife unfolding.

3-D Trivial Pursuit
Don’t even ask me how that would work, or what possible purpose it would fill. It’s just nonsense.

A heated clothes-drying mannequin
So that you could dress it, and then your clothes would dry with no creases. You’d probably need a few of these…

Calendar, geography and weather-sensitive playlists
An iPod playlist generator that knew what the weather was like, what day of the week it was, whether it was a holiday, and where in the world you were – and then made an entirely appropriate playlist just for you. First up, A Foggy Day in London Town…

The USB-powered electric toothbrush
Yep.

Shoes with sand-filled soles
So everywhere you go, it’s like walking barefoot on the beach.

…and so on. This is just a sample of some of the ideas I’ve had over the last ten days that have not made it to the blog. You can see why. There are much worse ones. Ones that if I told you, you’d think less of me.

The point here is that there aren’t people who have good ideas – there are only people who just decide to have lots of ideas, and then only tell you the ones that aren’t cripplingly embarrassing.

In the last ten days, I’ve come up with well over 100 ideas. Fortunately, some of them have been sufficiently interesting to blog about. Tomorrow, ten more ideas minimum – and I’ll tell you about one of them.

Tagged: fail